That shit is offensive!

        The whole world is split into two, one for freedom of speech and the other totally against it. Here I am making my own list. Knowledge of "self"is essential  to get a better understanding of the world. I read many posts on this issue and it made me think about which side I am on.

“yo’mama” and insulting comedy cracks me up but when someone is laughed at or ridiculed in a movie based on their sexuality I cringe.

So in real life when do i get offended?

Here is a short list of things that I consider are offensive.

I am offended when….

1.   someone yells at me at work.

Even if I make a mistake, I don’t wanna be yelled at! I haven’t gotten the zen realization yet, that the offender is just “an empty boat” and calmness of mind is what needed when that happens. I am consciously trying to apply it at such situations. Thanks to Zenhabits blog!

2.    talks to me disrespectfully.

Teasing me is fine I know me and I don’t need anyone’s approval or acceptance, but taking me for a sucker and talking to me with no respect do piss me off.

3.    an old friend doesn’t miss my presence.

some people become a part of our everyday thoughts. I met a wonderful girl four years back, we worked together and she became my  “bestest”  friend. We went everywhere together. She would do anything for me. She waved at guys on the road just to make me laugh. I moved to another town, I missed her terribly but she didn’t and that hurt me the most. Suppressing that emotion, I couldn’t even speak well with her the few times she called.

4.    a man touches me inappropriately when I am on the road helping a woman who was hit by a bike.

Yes, I thought she was the victim, and that she needed my help, but both of us were!

Most men are of the opinion that they can touch a woman and that the she shouldn’t complain about it, because “these things happen” and that if she doesn’t like it then she shouldn’t be on the road for any reason whatsoever! Scumbags!

5.   a woman breaks my trust and hurts me merely out of jealousy.

I am in many ways like her and so we hit it off very well at the start. She even offered to help me when she learnt I was a battered wife. But everything changed when I became popular with the colleagues more than her.  It just happened that some preferred me over her, to hang out or to decide on things. And she became my worst enemy as she knew all details of my personal life. The one whom I admired became the one to trouble me at work.

6.   some nice (?) guys, whom I think I can be friends with, think of me as a sex deprived single mom.

I don’t believe in labeling and generalizing (that’s why “most men” in my posts ) but how married women are treated or seen is different from how single(unmarried or divorced) women are perceived. Married women are not to be “played with” here. I think it’s out of fear, of facing the angry husband. May be.  The level of risk is higher for single women. I am hurt when an otherwise good guy thinks he can have a fling with me because I live alone.  That’s cruel.

7.   people of “power” (at work esp.) don’t offer me a chair.

Oh the stupid things we follow at (my) work place! Mr. “someone” is rude and “someone Sir” is respectful. Standing in front of a higher authority is respectful and sitting is not. Morons!

This doesn’t mean I am all innocent and saintly. I hurt others too in known and unknown ways.

But  the more I experience this unpleasantness the less I do it to others.

And I am happy with that.